Your Body Says Panic, Your Mind Says Fine | Work Anxiety Explained
About this episode
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High-functioning anxiety often masquerades as productivity. Your body sends distress signals—tension, racing heart, exhaustion—while your mind insists you're fine and in control. With guest Elke Scholz, we explore why high-achieving women experience this body-mind disconnect and share a powerful nervous system reset you can use at your desk in 2 minutes. Stop ignoring what your body is telling you about work stress before it becomes burnout.
Your body can be in full panic while your mind insists you’re okay, and that disconnect is one of the most confusing parts of work stress anxiety. Cheryl sits down with Elka to trace anxiety back to its less obvious roots, especially for high-functioning women juggling careers, caregiving, and the pressure to be “good” at everything. Instead of treating anxiety as one big problem, we treat it like a set of clues and start narrowing it down.
We dig into physical drivers that often get missed: caffeine tolerance, alcohol rebound anxiety, sugar crashes, dehydration, and the way sleep debt can wreck your emotional resilience after just a couple of nights. Elka shares how food sensitivities can trigger a body-based anxiety attack even when you feel mentally fine, plus why hormones and blood markers matter. If your finances are fine, your relationship is solid, and you still feel like you’re “freaking out”, we talk about why thyroid issues and iron deficiency are worth checking with a professional.
Then we zoom out to modern overstimulation and the stress of constant inputs. Phones keep us in FOMO and alert mode, and Elka describes the striking difference between frantic scrolling and the calm that comes from quiet, nature, and gentle sensory grounding. We also name the “shoulds”, perfectionism, and self-doubt that push high standards into chronic anxiety, and we touch on high sensitivity, memory triggers, and trauma held in the body.
If you want practical coping tools, Elka offers a free two-page PDF you can pick from, plus Cheryl shares a playful idea for a movement-ready playlist to help refill your cup. Subscribe for more conversations on work anxiety and nervous system regulation, share this with someone who’s quietly carrying too much, and leave a review so more listeners can find the support.
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Welcome And Why Anxiety Hides
SPEAKER_01: Hi, it's Cheryl and welcome to Work Stress Anxiety.
SPEAKER_01: One of the most striking moments, I think, in this episode is when Elka describes having a full-blown anxiety attack while mentally speaking fine.
SPEAKER_01: So I hope you enjoy this.
SPEAKER_01: Hi, it's Cheryl and welcome to work stress anxiety.
SPEAKER_01: So glad that you can join us today.
SPEAKER_01: We have Elka.
SPEAKER_01: Welcome, Elka.
SPEAKER_01: Hi Cheryl, happy to be back.
SPEAKER_01: Brilliant.
SPEAKER_01: Elka, today I was hoping that we could talk about some of the hidden sources of anxiety, especially around work stress and work anxiety for us high-functioning ladies who want to do well in the workplace, but also be good mums, be good carers, and just be good all-round human beings.
SPEAKER_01: So what I'm particularly interested in asking you is to perhaps maybe talk about the different sources of anxiety and I suppose the understanding that and the realization that anxiety doesn't always come from one source.
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, that when I started my um my hunt and my excavation of where anxiety was coming from, because it can feel so mysterious, and it comes, I I came up with 11 different sources.
SPEAKER_00: Now that sounds like a lot, however, I'm gonna list them.
Substances That Spike Work Anxiety
SPEAKER_00: The they're in the anxiety warrior series.
SPEAKER_00: And once you know them, you can just go through a checklist.
SPEAKER_00: And I do that.
SPEAKER_00: I um now that I I check in, I still get anxiety on occasion.
SPEAKER_00: I don't like it.
SPEAKER_00: To me, it's like the worst feeling ever.
SPEAKER_00: Um, so yeah, so um, and I and substances we talked a little bit about in the first episode.
SPEAKER_00: Uh just be mindful.
SPEAKER_00: You know, if you're dehydrated, you want to have a little bit of water.
SPEAKER_00: And it's interesting how substances can affect anxiety in our bodies.
SPEAKER_00: And sometimes, like I said, it's not obvious.
SPEAKER_00: And, you know, you might think you're okay drinking um, you know, six cups of coffee or two cups.
SPEAKER_00: Maybe you're not.
SPEAKER_00: And and maybe it's better with milk, or maybe it's better with a meal.
SPEAKER_00: I don't know.
SPEAKER_00: That's something you've got to figure out.
SPEAKER_00: And the same thing is, and the way I say the reason I say figure out is that each body is different.
SPEAKER_00: So uh my mom and my brother, they can have chocolate cake and um very thick espresso coffee at night and fall asleep.
SPEAKER_00: Me, if I look at chocolate at 3:30, I'm gonna be awake all night.
SPEAKER_00: So I'll have, you know, my um my kombucha or um a little piece of chocolate earlier because my body can metabolize it.
SPEAKER_00: It's just learning your body.
SPEAKER_00: Um, alcohol, sugar, all these things deplete your body of water.
SPEAKER_00: And that actually creates anxiety.
SPEAKER_00: People will have a drink thinking it'll relax them.
SPEAKER_00: It does temporarily, but then later creates anxiety.
SPEAKER_00: So that's how I, when I talk to people about some of these symptoms, we talk about, you know, what are they putting into their bodies?
SPEAKER_00: So that's a that's it's one I know I spent a bit of time on, it's one that we can control.
SPEAKER_00: And the other cool thing about it, your body immediately has a reaction.
SPEAKER_00: I'm working with a client, uh, getting them to sleep.
SPEAKER_00: And I said, the cool thing about what you're ingesting, your body's gonna tell you within 24 hours what's working.
SPEAKER_00: So you're gonna know, and sometimes quicker.
SPEAKER_00: So you're gonna know right away, um, and you do some experimenting.
SPEAKER_00: Uh, physical is another place, and here's here's where some of that hidden part, we talked about that scale.
SPEAKER_00: However, if you have, if you're not sleeping well, so if you have two or three nights not sleeping, your mental health is in the toilet, literally.
SPEAKER_00: So one of the things you want to do is protect your sleep and make sure you get good sleep.
Sleep Exercise And Body Basics
SPEAKER_00: Um, the other is um Alleluia.
SPEAKER_00: Hallelujah.
unknown: Yeah.
SPEAKER_00: Oh, I'm a great sleeper.
SPEAKER_00: So uh la and I protect my sleep.
SPEAKER_01: I'm I'm a mama bear when it comes to No, it's it's really interesting you say that because I've done a uh a recent episode about why I think sleep is I I think I called it the ultimate act of ri self-respect that you know we we take for granted our bodies.
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
SPEAKER_01: Uh we take for granted um sleep and we almost treat sleep as uh something that's an inconvenience.
SPEAKER_01: So I'm really glad you said that because I kind of feel really good about myself now, having you know discussed that.
SPEAKER_00: Oh yeah, sleep is uh is a top priority.
SPEAKER_00: Energy, energy is above sleep, and sleep is like way up there.
SPEAKER_00: So you want to have good sleep, so that means uh you need exercise.
SPEAKER_00: If you don't exercise, um that, well, let me put it the other way anxiety or exercise helps reduce anxiety.
SPEAKER_00: Uh some food sensitivities will create anxiety, and again, that's individual, and and it isn't always an allergy, there's food sensitivities.
SPEAKER_00: And it's interesting, Cheryl.
SPEAKER_00: I was having um uh a good time with my daughter, and I remember this this one time I just broke down in anxiety, I had a full-blown anxiety attack.
SPEAKER_00: And the crazy part about it was mentally I felt fine, and it was worrying my daughter and her grandma, and I just said, You guys, I'm fine, but my body is freaking out.
SPEAKER_00: And I learned about food sensitivities.
SPEAKER_00: So there were foods that I was eating, and a simple thing like avocado and and almonds, my body goes because my body's sensitive to it.
SPEAKER_00: So what happens, your energy goes into that, then you don't have energy for other things.
SPEAKER_00: So I I went for some testing and I found out some of my food sensitivities.
SPEAKER_00: And I've learned I oh mushrooms is another one.
SPEAKER_00: So these things are things that you wouldn't think you'd have an allergic reaction to.
SPEAKER_00: And I wasn't allergic, but my body had a hard time breaking them down, making turning me anxious.
SPEAKER_00: So, so it could be something like food sensitivities, also hormones.
SPEAKER_00: So depending, I've had people come in.
SPEAKER_00: So if you have a thyroid condition, let's say you sit there and I've had people come in, they're going, Elka, I don't know.
SPEAKER_00: I'm in a good relationship, my finances are fine, I'm healthy, I'm freaking out.
SPEAKER_00: So we go through and you know, go through that checklist.
SPEAKER_00: And if all these things are okay, you may want to get some blood tests.
SPEAKER_00: Um, iron deficiency will uh make you feel as if you're depressed.
SPEAKER_00: A thyroid condition can actually give you physical anxiety symptoms.
SPEAKER_00: So um, you know, we've got to like it's like checking off these lists, right?
SPEAKER_00: So those are some of the top ones.
SPEAKER_00: The other ones I can just quickly go through and then we you can stop me and ask me questions about them.
SPEAKER_00: So, reality, which we talked a little bit about.
SPEAKER_00: So that means decision making.
SPEAKER_00: Um, it could be a deadline for a project, it could be uh performances or presentations, you know, for for uh business.
SPEAKER_00: It could be a test or maybe uh an annual review, it could be court, so uh, you know, doctor's appointments, so that's reality.
The Checklist Of 11 Sources
SPEAKER_00: Over stimulation is one.
SPEAKER_00: The um we call it uh I don't know if you guys do, but FOMO, the fear of missing out.
SPEAKER_00: So it's that you know, we didn't have these.
SPEAKER_00: I didn't grow up with a phone and you know, our messaging Oh, it's interesting you call it a phone.
SPEAKER_01: It's not really a phone, is it?
SPEAKER_01: It's uh it's one of the most powerful computers ever invented.
SPEAKER_01: I mean, you think an average phone now, sorry to interrupt you.
SPEAKER_01: It's okay.
SPEAKER_01: An average phone now is more powerful than the computers they had during the world wars to break all those codes.
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
SPEAKER_01: So, you know, it it we call it a phone, but it's certainly not a phone.
SPEAKER_00: No.
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, and yeah, so you know, and I think you've probably had talks about like you don't want your phone on or near your bedroom, like you want to really create some peace because we're we're we're really animals, and we need nature and calm and those vibrations.
SPEAKER_00: And when we've got all these radio waves and Wi-Fi going on, we just want to minimize some of that.
SPEAKER_00: So that overstimulation, so again, is just kind of where are you at in that chart?
SPEAKER_00: Um, social and cultural beliefs.
SPEAKER_00: So if you hear yourself saying, wow, I really should, or I must, and I think you talked a little bit about um, you know, as women, we want to be the good mothers, the good business people, the good professionals, and we we start putting others' needs above our own.
Overstimulation And Phone Driven Stress
SPEAKER_00: And a lot of that comes from cultural and social beliefs.
SPEAKER_00: Um, and you know, whatever time we have, we can always go into that.
SPEAKER_00: Um, if we're not serving, if we're not taking care of, who are we?
SPEAKER_00: That that can create a lot of stress.
SPEAKER_00: So if you find you're saying, wow, I really should do something, like maybe it's about having the family dinner, but you really don't want to, your body goes into anxiety, then you've got to look at, you still may decide to do it, you gotta understand where is that coming from.
SPEAKER_00: And uh, you know, we talk about the angel and the devil and the cartoon, this inner voice, this self-doubt that comes along, that's another cause of anxiety, is you know, that's fueling anxiety and wanting to be, and I'm gonna call it perfectionism, is how can we be good enough?
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
SPEAKER_01: Right?
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
SPEAKER_01: Um, yeah.
SPEAKER_01: Well the P word, I call it.
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
SPEAKER_01: The what word?
SPEAKER_01: The P the P word.
SPEAKER_01: I call it the P word.
SPEAKER_01: Right.
SPEAKER_00: Well, it's it's it's okay to have high standards.
SPEAKER_00: Like I have high standards, right?
SPEAKER_00: And I aspire for growth and improvement.
SPEAKER_00: However, how can I be in a place of balance and know that that I'm showing up it's good enough, right?
SPEAKER_00: That like that I'm adding value, that it's good enough.
SPEAKER_00: And that is that's a bit of a battle.
SPEAKER_00: So that can create anxiety and um so the the remaining three, one of them is um the character trait of being highly sensitive.
SPEAKER_00: Um and that is a character trait, and it does come with anxiety and depression.
SPEAKER_00: However, the flip side of that is uh great intuition, um, very uh empathetic.
Shoulds Perfectionism And Self Doubt
SPEAKER_00: Um music and the arts move us differently and and beautifully.
SPEAKER_00: So again, it's about this balance and understanding, which I write about in the books.
SPEAKER_00: Memories can create anxiety.
SPEAKER_00: So these memories and triggers that some of them we know, others we don't.
SPEAKER_00: So something like smell or color or how somebody speaks can trigger us, and then we can have a uh somatic body reaction and not really have the upfront uh sense of it, if that makes sense.
SPEAKER_00: And then uh the last one um is trauma, and that one uh is in our bodies, and that uh, you know, maybe you know the trauma, maybe you don't, but that's where you want to get some professional help.
SPEAKER_01: So cool.
SPEAKER_01: No, thank you for going through that list uh with us.
SPEAKER_01: I I noted um uh a couple of things that I would like to talk about a bit more.
SPEAKER_01: Sure.
SPEAKER_01: Um, and that the two the two things I there was actually three things.
Sensitivity Memories And Trauma Signals
SPEAKER_01: But the third thing, the third thing when you mentioned about, you know, like if you've got some sort of event that you've got to do like a an interview or something, it just reminded me of me going to a a job interview.
SPEAKER_01: I really wanted the job.
SPEAKER_01: I I I I remember I I practiced, you know, questions for I think weeks before the interview.
SPEAKER_01: But I remember going to the interview, and yeah, obviously knowing that I was very nervous, and we had to do this is uh a long time ago, so the equipment that we had, we had like this overhead projection thing that we had to do a presentation with, and they couldn't get it to work.
SPEAKER_01: It was so funny.
SPEAKER_01: I was sitting there, nervous as you are, and they they were trying to sell it and they couldn't get it to work, and they sort of looked over at me and they said, Cheryl, do you know how to work this?
SPEAKER_01: And I went, Yeah.
SPEAKER_01: And I got up and I, you know, started fiddling with things as you do.
SPEAKER_01: And the thing is, just by doing that, just by laughing at myself in that situation, all my nerves literally disappeared within seconds.
SPEAKER_01: I was laughing, joking, I said it, you know, I was, you know, saying it this kind of thing happens all the time, you know, you make everything because it because it does, you set everything up, and then you know, you go to use the equipment and it just doesn't work.
SPEAKER_01: So um I just wanted to just share that with you that even something as important as a job interview, you can find a way to bring humour into that moment, and you might find that your anxiety just completely dissipates in that moment.
SPEAKER_01: But it was interesting you said iron.
SPEAKER_01: Now I know for a fact that for most of my life, adult life, I have been iron deficient.
SPEAKER_01: So um it's really interesting you you say that.
SPEAKER_01: And I I do my best, she says, to make sure, because I like to eat whole foods.
SPEAKER_01: I like to, if I'm gonna get anything, I like to try and eat whole food.
SPEAKER_01: So I'm getting it um in a way that my body recognises it as food.
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
SPEAKER_01: So try and eat, you know, beans and pulses, and um, I really love um, I can't remember what it's called now, black treacle.
SPEAKER_01: Can't remember what it's called.
SPEAKER_01: Um, but yeah, I love that.
SPEAKER_01: I love that.
SPEAKER_01: So um yeah, I try, I really try to make sure that I have iron.
SPEAKER_01: And I would encourage, I think a lot of working women for because of our the way we eat, um, we don't tend to eat a lot of raw foods, you know, we tend to eat quite a lot of cooked stuff.
SPEAKER_01: Um, that we we tend to have iron deficiencies, and we only find out when we get pregnant, and they do all those tests, you know, to make sure the baby's okay.
SPEAKER_01: Um, so that's really interesting.
SPEAKER_01: But the other thing that you mentioned, please, please talk about iron, but the other thing was the overstimulation.
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
SPEAKER_01: Over, you know, that I'm I'm really lucky, and I know that you live in the countryside as well.
SPEAKER_01: I within five minutes of where I live, it's total silence most of the time.
SPEAKER_01: And you know, I'm really fortunate we have horses and tractors and everything going by.
Quiet Nature And Digital Overload
SPEAKER_01: But it's only in the last sort of 30 years, I'd say, that's how old I am, showing my age now, um, that I've realized that peace and quiet is something that we all need, that we all take it for granted that we have shops around the corner and work is only five minutes away.
SPEAKER_01: Um, but just peace, that literally just being able to hear crickets or birds.
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, it's you know it's so important because I think what's happened, and I I was never a TV watcher even as a kid.
SPEAKER_00: I I was just my brothers would be sitting watching cartoons, and I'm just outside.
SPEAKER_00: I always wanted to be outside.
SPEAKER_00: And what I noticed, and I and I don't I I still don't watch TV.
SPEAKER_00: Sometimes I'll watch a movie.
SPEAKER_00: However, what I've noticed, you know, when you go in a shop and they have the TVs on and and or you're waiting somewhere and they have like six or seven things going on, like the bands uh top and bottom, the weather over there, accommodator here, and then it we're not wired to have that kind of stimulation.
SPEAKER_00: And that kind of got um slowly got busier and busier.
SPEAKER_00: And when I do watch TV, let a snippet at a friend's place or a program that maybe I watched 20 years ago, there's flashes and lights, and and when we're not used to it, we notice it.
SPEAKER_00: However, if you've kind of been watching certain programs, maybe you like it's almost like you got used to those flashing lights and those quick messages.
SPEAKER_00: I mean, TikTok, here's an interesting thing, because I work with students.
SPEAKER_00: I don't go on TikTok, I can't even stand it.
SPEAKER_00: And I'm I apologize for people that get beautiful things out of it, but um, my one student, she was shaking, her whole body was shaking.
SPEAKER_00: She didn't even notice as she's flipping through TikTok, and I just went, wow! And it was what was fascinating to me, because we were doing um a little workshop.
SPEAKER_00: I do Expressive Arts with them.
SPEAKER_00: She was getting a henna uh on her her uh little henna tattoo.
SPEAKER_00: So we had a beautiful woman come in and do henna, which of course you had to put your phone down and she had to sit there.
SPEAKER_00: And henna is very soft and it's almost like getting this sweet, loving um uh meditation and caressing on your hand.
SPEAKER_00: Well, her whole system, she wasn't shaking, she was totally calm, breathing.
SPEAKER_00: And I went, wow, what a contrast.
SPEAKER_00: So it's again being aware and and um this peace and quiet, it's almost if you're not, if you haven't had it for a while, it might be a little difficult to get used to again.
SPEAKER_00: And um it's important.
SPEAKER_00: Uh so however you can do it, you know, try little snippets, um, go into the country, sit on, sit in a park, watch some birds.
SPEAKER_00: I mean, start that way.
SPEAKER_00: And the more that we can get, it does help rejuvenate us for sure.
SPEAKER_01: And I mean, that's just a little snippet there, but yeah, because it's interesting you say that because I know so many people, not just women, who, you know, they go to work and they literally sit in the same spot.
SPEAKER_01: I mean, I I don't know how they do it for like eight hours.
SPEAKER_01: I mean, I'm up, I I'm such a fidgeter that it's it it would be physically impossible for me to do that.
SPEAKER_01: But they have no I they have that anxiety, they they get themselves worked up and they're and they're literally not moving.
SPEAKER_01: They're not they're constantly being overfed, overstimulated by what they're seeing on the screen all day long.
SPEAKER_01: So it's really interesting that you say that, Elka.
SPEAKER_01: And I'm really glad that you you've highlighted why it's so important that we c self-calibrate, that we check in with ourselves and we know where we are.
SPEAKER_01: And I know you've got a checklist uh around that, haven't you?
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, I in the books I give a checklist.
SPEAKER_00: And so to make it easy, that you can go through some of these things and ask yourself questions.
SPEAKER_00: And I do the book is about guiding that.
SPEAKER_00: It's it's a book that explains just what we're talking about and also different types of anxiety, uh, you know, anxiety attacks, panic attacks, social anxiety, different things like that, and then these strategies.
Tools Checklist Free PDF Closing
SPEAKER_00: And the cool thing uh that I was mentioning is I have I created um, I want to call it a beautiful two page PDF that's free, that um listeners can go onto my website and totally free.
SPEAKER_00: And these are techniques that I share with my clients, uh Teenagers, kids of all ages, adults, and it and there are techniques that are proven.
SPEAKER_00: They work.
SPEAKER_00: And um it's a whole two pages, so you can pick and choose.
SPEAKER_00: And there's even space on the bottom where you add your own.
SPEAKER_00: And when we were talking about the scale, it's really important to know what feeds your cup and to make those notes and add to that.
SPEAKER_00: You know, it might be a favorite song, it might be calling a friend, which isn't on those sheets, but you can add.
SPEAKER_00: Sorry.
SPEAKER_01: No, no, it's really interesting you say you saying that.
SPEAKER_01: And just before we we go, I need to tell you, I have I have this crazy idea.
SPEAKER_01: I often have lots of crazy ideas.
SPEAKER_01: But I wanted I wanted to create a Spotify playlist of all my favourite songs and favorite songs of my guests and clients.
SPEAKER_01: 365 songs that make you want to move.
SPEAKER_01: And I'm um the idea is to have it ready for December so that people can use it as part of their their you know, their festive celebrations.
SPEAKER_01: So I please, if I if you if I don't ask you, I want you to remember I I need you to tell me the songs that as soon as you hear them, whether you want to or not, you know, you get that urge to start, you know, moving those shoulders.
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
SPEAKER_00: Oh yeah, I've got a couple.
SPEAKER_01: Please share that with me so that I can pull it on on the on the list.
SPEAKER_01: Now I've got I've got stuff from 50s, 60s, I've got classical stuff.
SPEAKER_01: So it any genre, just I I I need those songs that we can build that playlist.
SPEAKER_00: That sounds great.
SPEAKER_01: And what I'll make Yeah, yeah, honestly, I'm the whole idea is just nuts, but I just thought, why not?
SPEAKER_01: Why not?
SPEAKER_01: Um what I will do um is I'll make sure that I put a link to your checklist in in my show notes because I like you say, I think it's really important that people have um tools that help them.
SPEAKER_01: And I'm look, I'm a lazy person, very lazy person.
SPEAKER_01: I'm interested in anything that makes my life easier.
SPEAKER_01: And if you've got a checklist, you're making my life easier.
SPEAKER_01: So I I'm all I'm all for that.
SPEAKER_01: So thank you for sharing that with us.
SPEAKER_00: Oh, 100%.
SPEAKER_00: And I I believe in that.
SPEAKER_00: That's part of my mission is you know, things don't need to be this difficult.
SPEAKER_00: And I think, you know, I didn't, I wish I would have had me growing up.
SPEAKER_00: I wish I would have had the books and the resources.
SPEAKER_00: Uh it would have made my adult, my early adulthood, um, a lot easier, smoother.
SPEAKER_00: I would have felt better.
SPEAKER_00: I would have made better decisions.
SPEAKER_00: And anxiety is is it's just it it feels it for me, it has been debilitating at times in my life.
SPEAKER_00: And my belief is it doesn't have to be so difficult, it can be easier.
SPEAKER_00: And that's why I do this work, and that's why I put the PDF together.
SPEAKER_00: That's why I created the books.
SPEAKER_00: I say they cost less than a pizza, and and they're there, they're available and they're easy.
SPEAKER_00: And I I have had good editors um that are very process-oriented, so you can follow the exercises, and then you can teach them, which is uh pretty great.
SPEAKER_00: And they're portable.
SPEAKER_01: Yes, yes, brilliant.
SPEAKER_01: So, Elka, I want to thank you for joining me today.
SPEAKER_01: I want you to thank you for sharing your expertise.
SPEAKER_01: I want you to to thank you for highlighting what especially us women need to be aware of.
SPEAKER_01: Thank you so much for joining me today.
SPEAKER_00: Thank you.
SPEAKER_00: My pleasure, Cheryl.
SPEAKER_00: My pleasure.
SPEAKER_01: You know, today's episode matters.
SPEAKER_01: Not because of any grand thing, but because one small step you can take today is noticing just one possible hidden source of anxiety that you may have.
SPEAKER_01: I'm not interested in you fine in 11, just one.
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